Friends Hurt You Too

createherstock-downtown-isha-gaines-6.jpg

In a perfect world, we would have the perfect friends who are always loyal, always by your side, and they would never hurt you. In the real world, that's not always the case. I have always struggled with the idea that even the people that I am the closest to will fall short sometimes in our relationship. No one is perfect; I know this. However, I think we all can admit that we expect our friends to NEVER hurt us even in the smallest of ways. 

I have lost many "friends" in the past which, back then, caused me to feel that my current friends aren't supposed to hurt me at all. The reality is; they will. Now, I am not saying that your friends can just do any and everything to hurt you and it's okay. I am simply saying that real friends disagree, they have conflict, they have days where things get a little rocky, BUT real friends work through it. Human to human interaction calls for some kind of friction; that's just a fact in all relationships. If you can work through those tough times, then you have a true friend. If you cannot, then maybe you weren't meant to remain friends (if you ever were to begin with). 

I know this topic may seem a little childish, being that I am 20 years old and concerned with friends. Most people my age feel as if people are disposable, so if even the smallest thing happens in a relationship, they just give up on it. I wouldn't say that I just have to have friends, but we all long for successful relationships. I have had a lot of unstable relationships with both female friends and male companions, but one thing that I have learned is that EVERYONE WILL HURT YOU. It is up to us to figure out what hurt we can work through and set boundaries for the future. It is also up to us to figure out what hurt is not even worth working through. Every relationship you encounter is not going to last forever.

I say all of this to say that friends hurt you too. It's just a part of life's learning process. I still struggle with accepting that statement, but it gets easier. We must remember one thing; everyone that enters our lives is either a blessing or a lesson. 

-m.